Home > Film, TV & Radio, Things I DON'T Like > Secret Cinema : G.O.O.D = S.H.*.T

Secret Cinema : G.O.O.D = S.H.*.T

G.O.O.D_1We went to Secret Cinema last night and despite some early misgivings about the whole event, it turned out to be far more disappointing than I ever feared it might be.

Secret Cinema is like Fight Club; you’re not supposed to tell anyone about it, but in light of the fact that we did everything we were asked to, fulfilling our side of the bargain, as you will see if you read on, I think the organisers fell well short of what could be reasonably expected of them.

Hence any perceived “contract” is null and void, and hence me feeling free to tell you all about it. So click away now if you don’t want spoilers…

The experience all started off intriguingly enough, as over the course of the week leading up to the event, we had to enroll online into a company called G.O.O.D, answer questionnaires to generate our security levels and the Departments to which we would be assigned. We had to dress appropriate to our new stations, print out business cards and bring specific items with us such as newspapers, marigold gloves and brief cases…

Also on the plus side, the organisers had obviously put a lot of effort into it: the disused office building in West Croydon was decked out over six or seven floors to resemble various scenes and aspects from the secret film, which was…  Terry Gilliam’s wonderful Brazil, which I must admit I was well chuffed about, as I’ve always been a huge fan.

The recreation of the office floor in which Sam Lowry worked with Mr. Kurtzman’s office tucked away at the back was particularly well done, whilst the restaurant with the string quartet and box like illuminated, numeric menus was also pretty impressive.

G.O.O.D_Transfer Notice JoeSo the first hour or so was all pretty good, with signing telegram roller girls, freelance heating engineers, and red boiler suited Central Services personnel all running around and interacting with the (huge) number of guests (or employees as we were encouraged to think of ourselves) milling about the six or seven floors that were open to us.

The problems started when after an obscure announcement telling us to follow the screens and not our dreams, we tried to find out where the screens were and where the film was being shown. The be-costumed people we asked were either evasive or just plain idiotic and as our frustration grew we were directed to the lifts to get even more frustrated by being taken to floors where only a couple of tiny televisions were showing a DVD of the film…

So we bought more drinks at extortionate prices from bars with massive queues and not enough staff, to calm us down and continued to look for the feature presentation. We met more and more angry and frustrated people as we traipsed from floor to floor, looking for any sign of the film. We found art installations (on big projector screens please note), freeform dancing and performance art and small monitors showing the film but with the sound turned down (although you could hear the soundtrack in the stair towers bizarrely enough, but that was on the other side of two fire doors).

Eventually (after an altercation of which I’m not proud) we were told that the film would be projected onto the outside of the building in a courtyard area, sometime after about 9 o’clock when it got dark. It would only start from where the film was up to at that time however (it started at 8.00pm) and we could only watch it through the office windows, which were too high off the floor when sat down, as you can imagine from this screen grab of the building below…

Good HQ

It did occur to me that this was all part of the experience. Brazil is all about petty bureaucracy and small mindedness after all, and maybe the actors were under instruction to make life as difficult as they could for us. All of which would have been OK, if we’d then seen the film as a reward.

Sadly though, I can’t think of this as anything other than a total con. Effectively it cost us £43 each for a few hours membership into a very expensive drinking club in less than salubrious surroundings, miles away from home in Croydon, with some side shows to dull our senses. About 25 of us went last night for a friends 40th Birthday, and all of us left either angry, disappointed or both, quite rightly believing that our collective £1000 could have been far better spent on almost anything else we could think of. Indeed the birthday boy and his wife were going to look into getting a refund, so ripped off did they feel…

It’s all such a shame really as it’s undoubtedly a good idea, and could work really well. We met some people who saw Prometheus and said it was the best thing they’d ever done (although they did get to see the whole film on a big screen)

We may have just hit a bad night or a ridiculous and over ambitious production, but I for one will not be duped again…

  1. Tony B
    May 12, 2013 at 17:52

    I could not agree more! Absolute rip off. I will contact the company to let them know how dissappointing the whole experience was. I would suggest all that went and feel let down do so as well:

    E8 3FN

    @fabienriggall (Twitter account of the owner of Future Cinema)

    • Tim
      May 13, 2013 at 08:04

      The Laundry Unit!
      Talk about being taken to the cleaners!

  2. Tim
    May 13, 2013 at 08:09

    The conspiracy theorists would have a ball with this one, what with the pyramid in the symbol!
    Also Croydon Power Station was the home for the location of the ministry building in “Brazil” which is now Ikea & only the chimneys are left.

  3. Steve
    May 18, 2013 at 03:22

    You can watch the film at home. Why would that bother you?

    You haven’t even mentioned the climax.

    • May 19, 2013 at 17:29

      We’d had enough by about 10.00pm and must have left before the climax…. what was it all about, what did we miss?

  4. Dilly
    May 19, 2013 at 00:15

    Blame the police for the number of bar-staff, they specified it in the licence.

  5. Peter F
    May 19, 2013 at 00:27

    So you went on May 11 and you’ve chosen to post 3 times on May 19th. Get over yourself. Its not all about your ego and indignation. Talk about petty mindedness, look to yourself. I saw a completely different show to you and I loved it. Maybe you should stick to the Odeon, with overpriced popcorn, no alcohol, adverts and no ability to talk to your friends during the film.
    Secret Cinema isn’t like fight club, its an immersive unique experience, you just wanted to watch a film (with you friends) – for that you really should hire a DVD.

    • May 19, 2013 at 17:24

      I don’t understand your opening comment.. We went on the 11th, I posted on the 12th, and I wrote up what I thought was an appropriate response to a disappointing and overpriced experience… Isn’t that what blogs are for?

      • Peter F
        May 27, 2013 at 13:56

        Nah, you posted it on the SC facebook page a week later. That’s just sour.

    • May 27, 2013 at 20:41

      For the record, it was not me that posted on the SC Facebook pages on 19th May. Sourness was not my intent, although disappointment was certainly my motivation…

  6. Beth
    May 19, 2013 at 07:37

    I thought it was amazing. The interactive role play was great fun, and the Information Retrieval floor was hysterical – we had a proper table tostling session! The movie projection I found stunning, especially the live elements that took place at the end. My only gripes would be that they could’ve had more actors getting people involved, and a much better bar / drinks selection.

  7. May 19, 2013 at 08:46

    A group of us went last night and I couldn’t agree more!!! None of us had even heard of the film… The building is also so big that most floors were half empty (or maybe people left early). The night cost a fortune and sadly, was a huge disappointment. Shawshank was amazing, but I wouldn’t fancy repeating last night’s experience. Thanks for the address, I will be complaining too as I really want SC to take on board what is being said by their ‘fans’ and get back to putting on great events!

    • May 26, 2013 at 10:22

      Oh go stick your head in the sand. If you want to see a film youve seen before then just stay at home. There were far too many people trying to act cool or expecting to just watch a film rather than enjoying the whole experience. If you actually interacted with the actors you got dragged into all sorts of surreal experiences. I was engaged in a stand alone storyline that took me around the building and ended up speaking on camera to the GOOD news team. It was so much fun. The people who seemed to have the least amount of fun were those who went in big groups because they just wanted to stick together and became too self aware and defensive.

      • P
        June 9, 2013 at 01:00

        Totally agree with this, and jealous of your seemingly amazing experience! Secret Cinema is not just a place where they show you a film and throw a couple of actors in there to keep you laughing, it is a totally immersive experience! The reason they said ‘follow the screens’ was so that you didn’t just sit down and watch it, i believe that SC was attempting to get people to walk into the section of the building that was relevant to the scene of the film as it was played, as it is a very long and confusing film and this saved time and would have helped people understand it more. But if you had already seen the film or guessed what it was before hand (which, by the way, not enough people do) then there would be no need to follow the screens… Just explore and interact and make an occasion of it all! I had guessed the film before i went, and only ended up watching about 10-20 minutes of it as i had heard there was a big ‘finale’ which was absolutely amazing!! And the projection screen in my opinion was just magical along with the whole experience! It makes me sad that people go to events like this and expect to be spoon fed the experience. You can sit and sulk about not being able to hear the film properly or see it clearly, or you can get involved and have some fun!

      • Sharon
        June 10, 2013 at 14:12

        Yep, I could see how that would work 1200 people all experiencing the same scene at the same time. What nonsense.

      • P
        June 10, 2013 at 17:27

        I was only suggesting, there must have been a reason to ‘follow the screens’. I don’t know though, everyone seemed to have a completely different experience, which is obviously bound to happen, i just wish that less of them were negative. It’s a shame- i think secret cinema put all of their effort into making it as fantastic as they could, i suppose the way they organised it was just not to everyone’s taste.

  8. Rebecca
    May 19, 2013 at 09:57

    Totally agree! And thanks for explaining why the film felt so short… Having spent ten minutes looking for a seat I knew I’d missed the beginning – and that I didn’t understand what was going on – but had no idea I’d missed the first hour or so! When it finished I was surprised though and just thought “is that it?! Very short!” as for being able to watch the film again in its entirety at home… Why would I want to? It may have a cult following but it’s hardly broadly regarded as a classic.

    They’d clearly put a lot of effort into decorating the building, but it was too large to get the intimate, immersive feeling. A canvas screen should have been rolled down the side of the building so you could see properly. Yes, a few interesting concepts but overall, rather a disappointing, chaotic mess rather than cohesive experience.

  9. May 19, 2013 at 15:24

    People – Get a grip. It was a really good effort as far as i’m concerned. My only gripe is that is all finished so early! There was so much to see and do and it was all about getting involved. The more you got involved the more you got out of it. I’m an art lover and I spend money on art exhibitions all the time. This production offered so much. Paper art, dance, music, acrobatics, fun psychological tests and so much more. Yes, there are things that could have been done better but was it worth the 43 quid. Absolutely.

  10. Sally
    May 19, 2013 at 20:10

    I get the feeling that the people that are against this article had a bad time and the people pro this article had a good time. My friends had an awesome experience yet I had a bad experience. I would like people to try and see this from both sides. I agree that the building and scale of the production was too big and therefore unfortunately the interactive elements became lost to some – I found myself aimlessly wandering around a lot desperate to get involved in the action and not being able to find anyone to interact with because of the scale – I also missed my induction (I arrived on time) because there weren’t enough seats and so kept getting told to wait. I felt I missed a lot of things through the course of the evening because there was just too much to do so I never made a decision to engage in one interaction because I felt like there was another better one happening around the corner. Overall I ended up becoming confused and increasing frustrated and jealous at my friends who were being well looked after by the venue. I am still upset, I love Secret Cinema but I feel I really missed out on this one and may not have done so if it had just been more guided. They’ve struck the balance right so many times before. What happened this time?

    • Peter F
      May 27, 2013 at 19:08

      How on earth do you expect to be ‘guided’ through the dystopian, confusing, bureaucracy laden world of the film – its not an organised world??!!!
      You also complain about having too much to do yet you highlight that it was YOUR choice to decide that ‘the grass is always greener somewhere else’ and then you blame it on Secret Cinema
      What happened this time was that you expected Shawshank, I’ve been to plenty of ’em. They aren’t all guided and authoritarian like Shawshank – some of them, you just wander around and happen on things.

      • Sally
        May 27, 2013 at 21:56

        Peter F :
        How on earth do you expect to be ‘guided’ through the dystopian, confusing, bureaucracy laden world of the film – its not an organised world??!!!
        You also complain about having too much to do yet you highlight that it was YOUR choice to decide that ‘the grass is always greener somewhere else’ and then you blame it on Secret Cinema
        What happened this time was that you expected Shawshank, I’ve been to plenty of ‘em. They aren’t all guided and authoritarian like Shawshank – some of them, you just wander around and happen on things.

        Firstly, I feel quite a bit of frustration in your response and that like others on here it is typically one-sided which does not open up easily to a nice discussion on the topic.

        Secondly, I was not expecting “Shawshank” as I did not go to “Shawshank”. It is wrong to assume.

        Thirdly, how could I NOT expect an organised guide through the evening when I had never seen the film and was not aware of the films themes and nature??

        I feel my response was not overall negative as you suggest in your tone. I was simply stating MY disappointments. I know everybody had a completely different experience. I was commenting on my OWN experience and adding pointers on how I thought the night may have run smoother. Call it constructive criticism or negativity as you will. I would like to state that I am attributing no blame and I clearly pointed out that I felt I may have had a better night if I had decided to do some of my actions differently.

        Secret Cinema are free to change the structure and format of their productions as they wish. They are a pioneering company in this field and I fully support them. I just didn’t understand why they had taken something that worked so well and changed it.

        End of.

    • Peter F
      May 27, 2013 at 22:19

      They didn’t change anything. They’ve done it like that before. I had a re-read of my ticket. It didn’t promise a guidebook.
      In fact it didn’t promise anything.

      • Sally
        May 28, 2013 at 12:42

        alright sarky. don’t get your knickers in a twist.

    • Lucy
      June 10, 2013 at 21:15

      That sums up how I feel perfectly…I heard about these other great ‘moments’ or activities that people got involved in or got to experience (typing tests, board meetings…I didn’t see anything like that going on)…but felt I got unlucky and just ended up missing them. I arrived on time, went to floor 12 as told but couldn’t find a single actor up there, had no idea who to report to and wondered round looking at – beautiful/amazing but – empty rooms. I LOVED the location and am a massive fan of the film, but felt I spent a huge amount of time waiting for lifts and being greeted by an almost empty floor. Had it been on a slightly smaller scale, maybe over 6 floors it may have felt more immersive and had more chance to get involved with the actors. I would definitely go again but feel I just got unlucky on this occasion.

  11. May 20, 2013 at 11:28

    I agree with most of the negative comments, my main gripe being unlike Shawshank where I really felt being part of the film and continuously led towards clues and interactive elements related to the film, i completely felt lost and unaware of how to progress throughout the building. I gave up after a while and just pondered each floor aimlessly.. After the amazing Shawshank experience, this one honestly was a major disappointment and don’t get me started on the prices for the ‘dinner’ and drinks. £43 pounds suddenly became £70-80!

  12. Laura
    May 20, 2013 at 12:10

    I didn’t go because of the price- no matter how good the event was or wasn’t £50 (When you include the booking fee’s you have to pay) is a LOT of money, especially when you add extortionate drink and food prices, and travel too. It’s making a lot of people turn away- and you all can say what you want- secret cinema did the EPIC blade runner with coaches and all for less than £30 back in the day.

  13. May 20, 2013 at 14:22

    I have to say after reading this article I feel a bit sorry for our esteemed writer. We went last night and had one of the best theatrical experiences I’ve ever been part of – on a par with performances by Punchdrunk and De La Guarda.

    The problem with the previous Secret events, (although I still loved them), was that they followed a clear narrative structure (i.e you started at the beginning, and when you got to the end you watched the film).

    For those of you reading this who haven’t gone, first of all let this guy off for giving the spoiler away; Go there with an open mind to explore, ask questions (to engage with the plot line – not ask when the damn film is on…), get lost, do something that makes you uncomfortable, play a character.

    Our reviewer/plot spoiler does have a few valid points:

    1) It is not a bar – If you wanted that there is a great Weatherspoons in South Croydon
    2) Most likely you will miss a significant chunk of the film on the screen – but if you engage with what’s going on, then you will realise when you avidly watch the film another time, that you were in the damn story the whole time.
    3) If you want to see a film sitting with your popcorn then I’d recommend you save your money and go to the multiplex on the Purley Way – I hear Fast & Furious 6 is really great…

  14. Sid P
    May 20, 2013 at 17:26

    I went to Secret Cinema on Saturday 18th May. It was my first time at Secret Cinema.

    I enjoyed myself. I felt that the 43 quid was justified by the scale of the production and the number of actors involved. If you think that a Saturday night out often costs £50-£80 anyway, £43 plus bits is in line anyway.

    Initially on entering the venue I felt that I was in a kind of festival where I could wander round and have random experiences! But… I did have a few gripes:

    a) Finishing at 10:15 in Croydon is not cool. I just went back to central London and thence home. Finishing at 10:15 in Hackney (as with Shawshank Redemption) in zone 2 would have been much better.
    b) I didn’t know the film!!!! I’m not a film buff, but I’ve seen a fair few films in my time. I would have much preferred to have known the film and been able to relate to the characters and scenes.
    c) Maybe it’s my imagination, but I thought the actors were working really hard at the beginning and then eased off… These people were important to the experience. Some by the way were great.

    People’s comments about the set being too big were probably fair, although I did love exploring.

    Based on my personal experience, it would be 50-50 whether I go again. Based on the fact that people’s comments indicate that this production was worse than usual, I will likely go again.

  15. May 21, 2013 at 16:25

    I went to this event on Saturday May 18th as well & this was my 4th Secret Cinema event. I’m a massive fan of the events but I have to agree. I was left sadly disappointed with this installment.

    The event started with huge promise – the lead up, the first 30mins where I was actively involved with the experience being employed by G.O.O.D. as part of the media team recording messages for the employees and interviewing employees etc was fantastic. I was especially impressed that the actors I had interacted with as such remembered by name and job role later in the evening. But once you were left to your own devices (as obviously other people needed to experience their job roles, etc) we were left a bit clueless. We explored the different levels (waiting at great length numerous times for an elevator, or fighting our way through the stair wells) which were impressive when you think about the effort that must have gone into this installation. But actually, if you arrived at the floor when something wasn’t going on, there wasn’t much to see. Never having seen the film prior to Saturday night, by boyfriend & I were at something of a loss as to what to do with ourselves before the film started at 8pm.

    We had met a ‘terrorist’ earlier in the night who had said to meet her at 8:40 at a specific location to join the cause. So at 8:35 we left the little TV we’d been watching & did so. To be honest, this was the best bit of the night, running round the building performing covert missions and learning how to be a ‘terrorist’. But we’d then missed 40mins of the film and were truly clueless as to what was going on. And the night went further downhill from there.

    I’m 24, so I’m not adverse to a drink. But as with Shawshank last year, unfortunately alcohol appears to now be central to the experience and as a result, drunks talk over the film, interact inappropriately with the actors & try to make them lose concentration and also became somewhat disruptive to the installation itself on Saturday – one girl started trying to take stuff apart and was throwing papers and glasses all over the place laughing her head off. It just seemed disrespectful of the event to me.

    We’re absolutely gutted by Saturday – not to mention feeling out of pocket for the night! All the others we’ve been to have been 100% worth every penny and I would not hesitate to recommend Secret Cinema. But sadly based on Saturday night’s performance, I may have to reconsider my standing on this.

  16. May 23, 2013 at 11:01

    II’ve told everyone that going to watch this first http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g9-vfjJjx3I the directors cut on YouTube, everyone that had a Pre-Screenig party had a great time. 🙂

    • joefish
      June 1, 2013 at 17:42


  17. May 26, 2013 at 19:43

    I absolutely disagree. My friend and I had a fantastic evening and we loved it. We interacted with all the actors and as a result were advised by several different actors what time and where to be. The point is not to watch the film anyway – why would you want to do that when so much is going on in every room of every floor! You can watch the film in your living room. I also think it is really selfish and thoughless of you to reveal all the film details when there are loads of people still due to go.

    • May 27, 2013 at 13:01

      Hi spellbound2
      You may be right about revealing the film, however I did advertise that fact that I was going to do so with more than enough time for you and others to click way… I’m sorry If I spoiled the surprise for you though. In truth when I wrote this post back on the 11th, I hadn’t realised that the productions were going on all month..

  18. May 26, 2013 at 20:45

    Hello. Which fucking knobhead would actually pay £40 to watch an (admittedly classic) film that was released yonks ago? I’m sorry, this whole Secret Cinema thing is absolute bollocks – ‘you’re going to pay £40 and then pretend to be a confused office worker (and then what?) – then we’re going to charge you extra for drinks (and then what?) then you’re going to say confused office worker things – it’s going to be hilarious (and then what?) and then you’re going to sit down and watch Brazil, which you could have done at home.

    ‘Hey we’re going to charge you £40 dress you up as a prisoner’ (and then what?) ‘and then you’re going to say prisoner things’ (and then what?) ‘then you’re going to sit down and watch The Shawshank Redemption, which you could have done at home’.

    Sorry, anyone who participates in this is a mug who doesn’t really like film, sorry but you don’t, all this horseshit just detracts from the basic action of watching a film. If being in an actual cinema and just watching a film, the action of watching a film, a great great film isn’t enough for you, you entitled sponge wankers – then you can each give me £40 and I’ll pay for a Soho cowboy to bum you while you watch my scratched copy of Brokeback Mountain – I’ll be moonwalking all the way to the bank.

    • Sarah
      May 31, 2013 at 20:38

      Pa ha ha

    • Gerald
      June 1, 2013 at 16:09


    • Bobby Z
      June 7, 2013 at 14:49

      You have the right never to go to a Secret Cinema if you don’t like it…and you’ve obviously never been to one either.

  19. Sharon
    May 26, 2013 at 21:56

    I went last night and left disappointed. First time at Secret Cinema and I had high expectations; I did everything I was asked to do and then just carried business cards, copies of letters etc. around in my bag.

    I was separated from my friends for the 30 min induction which was chaotic with no further direction and then wasted 30 mins trying to get into the lift to meet my friends who had been sent to the 12th floor! So the first hour was appalling!

    By the time we met up, the film had apparently started and so we spent another 20 mins trying to find out where it was being showed but no one would tell us! We then realised that if we sat and watched the film then we wouldn’t have ‘the experience’; we concluded there were different start times as so many people were still around … We were naive!!

    We then did a couple of interactive things which included a good 15mins with the terrorist nuns and 10 mins donating 1p to the national debt (and getting our bottoms smacked), until we sat down to have something to eat … Finally, we saw the film being projected onto the side of the building. The waitress told us ‘it’s half way through’ and ‘Its a long film, probably best just watching bits of it’!! This was the moment we all burst out laughing! One of my friends actually checked the times of the Great Gadsby as an alternative!

    I had never heard of the film and quite frankly found much of the interactive stuff frustrating/boring as there was no context. The food was ok but such small portions; the drinks were expensive but I expected that and wouldn’t have minded if I had had a good time.

    Ironically, I have watched the film this evening and with context can reflect on how clever it all was but sadly they definitely got it wrong on the night!

  20. Sharon
    May 26, 2013 at 21:59

    Btw, the secret is watch the film before you go!!

    • Woyzeck
      June 15, 2013 at 12:17

      …but you don’t know what film it is before you buy the tickets.

      (Is this not part of the problem? When I went to see Punch Drunk’s Faust, I missed bits of the performance, due to being in a wheat field, but it didn’t matter because I know the story of Faust)

  21. May 27, 2013 at 00:40

    I have to agree with the original poster. This was extremely disappointing. As a film buff it is surprising that I haven’t seen Brazil, but it’s always been one that got away.

    My day consisted of filing some paper I had printed out at home, messing around on a steam punkish PC and then being told to report to the 4th floor. The 4th Floor consisted of a comically expensive bar. I’ve happily paid £15+ for a cocktail, but I balked at £4 for a SMALL warmish Carslberg. As for the mechanically reclaimed meat hot dogs, even at free they were over priced.

    There is such an emphasis on what they are selling that the comments from Ashley P don’t really hold water for me. Vending machines, drink stands, massages (£10 for 5 mins), and restaurants, and you were directed to them.

    Some of the acting was good, but having not seen the film it had limited context or interest. (I did leave the fourth floor and explored the rest). The sets were good, if you are a huge Brazil fan I have no doubt you’ll love it.

    The showing of the film was arguably the worst aspect. Nobody seemed to have any idea what was going on and a lot of people were grumbling. At this point I searched the web and found this blog. That was a relief, it saved us waiting to see (only) the second half of the film, ruining the spectacle for future viewing.

    For the price of the tickets (let alone the exorbitant refreshments) we could have seen two productions at The National. We’ve hardly been disappointed in many, many productions there.

    Poor value, too many oriented, hopeless if you haven’t seen the fairly obscure film. We’ll probably stick to Future Cinema, rather than Secret from now.

  22. May 27, 2013 at 11:29

    I saw a Secret Cinema screening of The Red Shoes a couple years ago in Wapping. The screen was rather small and we had to sit on fold-out chairs (it was not the most comfortable situation for a long film). However, the collective experience was so different from anything I’d experienced before that I thought the pros really outweighed the cons.

  23. jonas
    May 27, 2013 at 22:28

    The comments on here seem to be part of a Brazil-based online performance art piece, with everyone taking a bureaucratic approach to assessing and organising their collective reactions to the night. Perhaps every comment is actually from a SC actor. Including this one.

  24. Roger
    May 28, 2013 at 00:07

    After reading a lot of these comments i felt compelled to write one myself. I dont know exactly what anyone was expecting when coming to see this event but I for one do not expect to pay £50 to see an old movie screened however brilliant it is! I pay for the experience, the feeling of actually being inside the film, getting the chance to interact with characters and moments that would otherwise only be seen on a flat screen.

    I was exploring non stop and still know i didnt see or do everything because my friends who i came with had different experiences.. probably due to the fact we went with the flow even if it meant splitting up for a while. There are amazing things called mobile phones. all you have to do is dial your pals number and meet them somewhere in the building when you find yourself at a moments stop. It just added to the special nature of the experience for us!

    I KNOW there was no way the film (at over 2 and a bit hours) could be shown AND any kind of performance created or lived if it had to be shown conventionally in screening rooms and no other things happening around you.

    For the people who complained they should get a refund…. how long did you stay exactly?? half an hour?? 20 minutes.. an hour even?? No, probably all 4 hours! all the while moaning but still exploring and finding things to be a part of. Yes the film wasnt shown in a conventional way, but it WAS shown. Announcements were made over the tannoys saying follow the screens regularly before the film started… but really who cared? Living the film was much more exciting! Its on youtube just watch it there! FOR FREE!

    You could pay a hell of a lot more for a West End play which could be shockingly bad and not expect a refund. There were what felt like 100 actors working, not to mention all the other staff running the event! That kind of organisation doesn’t come cheap im sure!

    One thing i can agree on is that the food/drinks are a bit overpriced and that could easily be rectified by lowering them.

    Of course there were elements that were not great… But what is perfect when it comes to creating new and exciting art? I feel like a lot of Secret Cinemas audience are acting like spoiled children who have always got way more than they should have and the one time it isnt exactly what they want they throw a strop.

    I for one loved it yes it wasn’t perfect, yes it wasn’t my favourite but it doesn’t deserve the response its getting from people who probably should just stick to going to the multiplex or panto at christmas time.

    Looking forward to the next projects they stage.

  25. May 28, 2013 at 12:09

    amiecaitlin :
    unfortunately alcohol appears to now be central to the experience

    I didn’t drink anything and still had a great time. This production was about getting involved, exploring and experiencing the film in a completely different way.

    I have never seen this film before, but still got the gist of it and was delighted to find similarities in the snatches of it that I caught when the projection came on.

    They sounded an alarm when the film was about to start – I ignored it, choosing instead continue exploring. I know some people didn’t hear/notice this but in the end, Secret Cinema is about immersion, not spectating. I watched some of it on the projection – which was fine, if anyone was uncomfortable because this was too high – why not go upstairs?

    Also there were 13 floors, not 5 or 6, contrary to the writer’s comments. This smacks of somebody not making the most of what is made available to them.

  26. May 28, 2013 at 12:10

    I should add that I was separated from my friends, and when I caught up with them I decided to go off alone anyway as this allowed me to explore and absorb at my own pace and meant that we had great stories to compare afterwards.

  27. May 28, 2013 at 12:26

    “I feel like a lot of Secret Cinemas audience are acting like spoiled children”.

    Just because we have a different perspective and opinion to you?

    “from people who probably should just stick to going to the multiplex or panto at christmas time.”

    Several people have said that they thoroughly enjoyed previous SC events, so why state they belong in a multiplex?

    “I KNOW there was no way the film (at over 2 and a bit hours) could be shown ”

    Well Shawshank had a brilliantly immersive environment and still showed the film in full. So I’m not sure how you reached that conclusion.

  28. Michael
    May 28, 2013 at 13:25

    To anyone from Secret Cinema I just want to say I had a Fabulous night. This was my first Secrete Cinema, I went with no expectations and came away feeling like I’d had one of my best nights yet. I go to a lot of theater, in my mind I treated this as a theatrical experience not a cinema experience.

    In response to the blog, everyone is entitled to an opinion, but rather then trying to direct peoples attention to your blog have you considered that immersive theater isn’t for you?

    For those who haven’t been let me set the scene, a 13 story building with an underground car park dressed up like a movie.. The movie is being played around you, no not on a big screen (although it is possible to watch the movie like this) but by actors.

    I was split up from my party early on so I spent most of the night exploring on my own, this was fine for me as cast members constantly collard me to complete tasks, to speak to people, to play games, join in staff development, dance.. it was for me, non stop.

    When the movie was playing outside in the court yard I was in an Austin Powers style bar on the 13th floor drinking cocktails and dancing with cast members.

    So price… this seems to upset a lot of people, how much should this cost? To me this felt like an expensive production to put on. when a West End ticket can cost £95 Secret Cinema is a budget ticket.

    Drinks Prices.. Lets get real here, this blog describes the drinks as ‘overpriced’. Beer or wine £4, cocktails from £5-£8.50, that is an average price for a night out. There is a bar on every level as well as vending machines selling wine and beer. I didn’t once have a problem with ques.

    For me I didn’t need to see the movie, I haven’t seen it or heard of it but I got the plot just by being part of it. Me and my friends are having a movie night to enjoy the film with popcorn and wine, I get the feeling this would have suited you more then taking part in Secret Cinemas most recent production.

  29. Meech
    May 28, 2013 at 15:30

    Think it’s great that this blog has sparked so many comments – I didn’t know much about SC before, but now I do I might look into going to one of the events to see for myself….. Thanks Joe and everyone.

  30. G man
    May 29, 2013 at 13:43

    Just to add my two penny’s – bought as a present and excited to attend my first Secret Cinema experience. Only to be bitterly let down the silo structure of the venue, meant everything was fragmented. Love interactive theater but came away thinking how do i explain this dismal waste of time to the guy that brought the gift.

  31. May 29, 2013 at 14:11

    Michael, I’m always a big fan of judging people’s likes and dislikes on precious little information, so well done there.

    £4 for a small warm Carlsberg is not average for a night out. Nor is £5 for a hot dog barely fit for human consumption.

    Just because someone doesn’t enjoy the same thing you did, it doesn’t mean they aren’t suited to SC. Many have said the previous production (Shawshank) was far better. It’s an opinion, not invalid because it’s not yours.

    Not enjoying this particular immersive theatre is not the same as not enjoying any. While we’re on the subject, Secret Cinema hasn’t come remotely close to YMBBT, which admittedly is much shorter but an almost infinitely better experience.

    • May 29, 2013 at 14:36

      Having read the original comment by Michael above, I’m not sure what you mean by

      Ian Harvey :
      Michael, I’m always a big fan of judging people’s likes and dislikes on precious little information, so well done there.

      It doesn’t read as a ‘judgement’ simply as another opinion. Are you highlighting it because it denotes a positive view of this SC event and attempts to describe his own personal experience of the night? Or just because you feel upset by the contradiction to the general status quo?

      Your comparison of SC to YMBBT is completely misguided, the entire structure of each event is completely different – YMBBT essentially hands the experience to the participant on a platter, whereas with SC you only take you you put in. If people choose not to poke about and open doors, explore and interact (and yes, alone, if needs be) then of course they will not enjoy the experience, it’s as simple as that.

      As far as drinks prices, I will reiterate that I didn’t have any drinks and didn’t enjoy the experience any less for being sober. What’s more, I don’t know much about the volume differences between a can and a bottle of beer, but if you have never paid £4 for a bottle of Becks then I commend you; It’s standard West End pricing.

      And although, granted, the hot dog itself wasn’t best I have ever tasted, personally, I found it filling, satisfying, and exactly what I wanted at that time.

      I think that people need to understand that YES, some people had a miserable time. And others had a so-so time. But whether it was an open mind, or just a lack of standards, others had a great night and can find that the positives outweigh the negatives, and that all in all, it was money well spent.

      • May 30, 2013 at 10:23

        From Just
        “It doesn’t read as a ‘judgement’ simply as another opinion.”

        From Michael
        “Me and my friends are having a movie night to enjoy the film with popcorn and wine, I get the feeling this would have suited you more then taking part in Secret Cinemas most recent production.”

        That reads as fairly judgemental to me. You may have different criteria to me.

        I am quite happy for you to have a different opinion to me.

        Just accept that this particular SC has received a lot of negative feedback. Not because the participants are unsuited to SC, but because they didn’t like this particular one.

        Seems to me it’s you that can’t accept a different opinion. This SC just has been generally less well accepted.

        I’ll ignore your other pejorative statements, life’s too short, but glad you enjoyed SC.

  32. Rick
    May 30, 2013 at 13:52

    Our party wishes to stay together at the start & we dont mind knowing the first 30min activity, could anyone who’s been advise us on which activity to pick out of:


    (a) CRAFT skills bring a ball (b) CRAFT skills bring a camera (c) Unemployed bring pound shop item (d) WRITING skills bring 10 copies of form

  33. Josh Koops
    May 31, 2013 at 11:44

    Sorry mate but I dont agree with you. What a great night out….. if you open up and don’t be shy and make the most of the experience you barely need to watch any of the film as live shots happen infront of you (and you get involved in the live scenes).

    Yes there are only little screens about, but they is the way the film was…. would you expect 50+ inch LCD/plasma screens to be pasted around the props and floor settings? The whole show made for good viewing!

  34. Andy
    May 31, 2013 at 16:57

    I was another disappointed customer I’m afraid. Id heard amazing things about past events, but this was nothing like those descriptions.

    I know people have said over and again that its not about the film – but what really pushed me over the edge was that on the only level where the film was being shown, all of the (tiny, old, low def) TV’s were blurry and had ghost images – which I’m pretty sure is caused by having too long cables and not enough power in the system. Id say getting the TV’s wired up properly was the least they could do for a place that calls itself Secret Cinema.

    PS Watch next weeks Apprentice for people trying to bluff their way through team building away days and bonding exercises – pretty sure you’ll spot a few of the same blags from last nights SC!

  35. hannah
    May 31, 2013 at 21:34

    I completely agree with agree with all of the above! Here with my boyfriend. We feel so disappointed. Such a waste of money. I really enjoyed shawshamk redemption but unfortunately I will not be participating again.

  36. Harold
    June 1, 2013 at 16:08

    I am have afraid I have to agree.
    This was my first Secret Cinema experience, and probably also my last one. I had heard amazing things about the Shawshank Redemption and other SC productions, but this was a dreadful experience.
    It started out in an exciting manner. We received a message on what to wear, and to bring various gadgets. It was all mysterious and kept us guessing. The deco look very cool and set the tone. We were directed to the second floor and needed to report to some officer, who instructed us to walk over to one of the computers so that we could fill in the passwords were had been given beforehand.
    After that, however, we were left to our own devices and needed to figure out what we needed to next.. At no point, were we told when and where the movie was going to be shown. We joined in with some of the games, but since only a few of us had seen the movie, none of it made any sense. Neither was it fun or entertaining, since some of us work in offices and have had our fair share of being from pillar to post. We dragged from floor to floor, whilst being reminded about 10 times that we should check out the restaurants. The Asian food, although not great, was reasonably priced. The overpriced drinks were a total rip-off. The elevators were an absolute nightmare. We sometimes needed to wait for 10 minutes.
    After about one and a half hour we finally managed to go up to the 13th floor, expecting to finally find a screen and to watch the movie. Instead, we found a cocktail bar, and an actor in a wheelchair stating that some ritual was to take place in 30 minutes. After hanging around on the top floor and being really bored, we were finally told that the movie was to start at 9.
    As it turned out, the movie had already started to play. not one big screen, but on small tv screens dispersed over the whole of the building. In fact, we only saw 3 tv sets, and the sound was cringeworthy.
    Finally we made it to the lower floors to watch the rest of the movie. By now, 3 of our friends had headed off.
    To sum it up: Nobody told us that the movie wouldn’t be shown on actual cinema screen and we missed most of the movie. We walked aimlessly through a building for one and a half our. The production is big and professional, but no clear instructions were given. We noted that the actors got irritated after some time, and so did many of the visitors. The elevators were not functioning properly. There were no seats or tables to eat our curries at. The drinks were expensive.
    A waste of money.

  37. Asdf
    June 2, 2013 at 02:50

    Yep, it was a terrible production given the price. Felt like a cheap imitation of SC we have come to know.

  38. Ian Wright
    June 2, 2013 at 18:55

    I think you’ve missed the point. You are entitled to your opinion but why spoil the “secret” for people who haven’t been to see it yet. Please take all references to the actual film out of your post.

  39. Sharon
    June 2, 2013 at 23:51

    No I think you have missed the point … The film is so secret you don’t get to see it! In my opinion seeing Brazil before you go is a pre-requisite to making any sense of the whole production.

    • John
      June 4, 2013 at 07:14

      But, it is Secret Cinema, you don’t know what the film is!!!!!

  40. Jon
    June 3, 2013 at 14:30

    I saw it last night and wish I read this beforehand. I didn’t get last night at all and I feel disappointed with my experience. I think I would have had a much better experience if I’d actually heard the of the film before or knew any of the plot. Combined this with not really being able to see the film then for me the night just felt like a serious of random events that made no sense or had any feeling of a storyline.

    As mentioned above when we got there me and my partner were split up and we didn’t see each other for the next 90 minutes which she hated. We both had people on our teams that felt the same way, it was one guys birthday and he was on his own.

    When we did find each other it was the time of screen or dream which is when the structure seemed to disappear and we then just randomly walked around feeling lost. We tried to get stuck in and we did a few random missions but neither of us really felt part of ‘it’. We both felt we were just doing random silly things just for the sake of it rather than interacting in a movie (I’m hoping when I watch the film in the future last night make some sort of sense).

    Around 9.00ish when we found a large group of people in the funeral bit the night got much better and it seemed like we found the plot so to speak. We both enjoyed the night from that point, unfortunately I had to get a coach from central at 11.30 and as Croydens so far out we had to miss the ending. So for a 4 hour experience I only really enjoyed an hour of it which is why we were both disappointed.

    I also think £4 for a small can of beer is ridiculous

  41. Mark
    June 3, 2013 at 18:30

    Although I loved Brazil when it was initially released (saw it a couple times), it was a bad selection for the Secret Cinema. It’s been so long since I saw it that I could barely make the connection between the scenes in the film with those that were recreated in Croydon. Also, based on what I observed of the others attending, the target audience appears to be late 20’s and 30’s…a demographic that were barely alive when the film was released almost 30 years ago. There were so many people who simply didn’t know the film and they were being herded around and given tasks without having any context. I was a big fan of SC, but now feeling ripped off.

  42. John
    June 4, 2013 at 07:11

    Sorry to say, mega disappointed on Saturday night. A few years ago, we travelled in water filled tunnels, being warned to be careful before coming out in a amazing old Vienna, then last year we were sentenced and taken away to a very scary prison, this year was turned up at a (basic) office block, and it felt like only a  office block, ok, there was a few bits of scenery, a few side offices, but it seemed no real attempt to convert the building to the dark ‘Brazil’ world we had no sense of being part of the film, the evening also had no real time frame or structure. 
    Then when the film started, we had no seats (we had my partners daughter with us, who was 7 months pregnant.) and had problems watching what was tiny TV’s and no-chance to hear the sound. Then when it changed to the live action, most could not see, as a lot of the action was on the ground floor middle arena, and with 4/5 people thick, on the above floors, we had no-chance of looking down. 
    The big building screen opposite, kept having people open the blinds, so there was gaps in the picture. We had brought 3 new people with us, but they left wondering what we being going on about, all these years. 
    We never once felt part of a film set, just among a lot of people dressed in fancy dress wandering around. All this after we had our first night cancelled at the last moment. We try again, but SC need make the next one work, this didn’t and listening to comments on the night, we are were not the only ones who thought this.

  43. Samantha Beere
    June 8, 2013 at 08:16

    Your review was really helpful in that it prompted me to re-watch the movie before going to the event, as I hadn’t seen it in many years. Reading the comments gave me some good advice on what to expect and how to move around inside the venue.

    As a result, I had a simply marvellous time! I loved it – completely loved it. My only gripe was that I felt I’d barely scratched the surface of what was there and wanted a whole lot more time to explore.

    Some of the others in my party didn’t have such a great time. Two of them wanted to remain unspoiled beforehand, but honestly, I think this is where Secret Cinema makes a mistake. I don’t think not knowing the movie is a big deal or the reveal is some kind of exciting surprise. I think it’s far more enjoyable if you’re familiar with the movie and can therefore appreciate it. I didn’t bother watching the movie while I was there – that would have been a waste of money when I could watch it at home far more cheaply. I was there to experience the movie, and I did just that. I thought they’d done a terrific job of mirroring the world of the movie, and so many things from it were familiar. The actors were terrific and the way they’d imagined the world was great – that was the perfect building for it.

    Because I’d read all the comments here, I knew to get stuck in and talk to the actors and be part of things from the beginning. I didn’t waste my time completing the Sudoku puzzles we were put in a room to do – after a bit of desk jostling, I rebelled and got fired and was sent to the the 9th floor. I suppose it’s like the message of the movie – your life becomes a lot more exciting if you break out from what you’re supposed to do and take a few chances, but if you hadn’t watched the movie you wouldn’t know that! From there, I talked to actors and asked them where I should go next. That was the key to having a good time! As a result, I went to the funeral at 8pm which was enormous fun, joined a party, had my personality tested, went to do speed dating and attended the wedding.

    Some of my friends felt the first hour was wasted – they didn’t like us all being split up, and they were too compliant and obedient so ended up doing as they were told and being bored and frustrated. When we all managed to meet up, I think the evening improved for them but it was annoyingly too late because things do slow down as the evening goes on and some of the sideshows packed up around 9. I wish I hadn’t wasted my time printing out business cards or worrying about my costume and connections – none of that mattered remotely. It was fun to be dressed up though – it was wonderful looking at some people’s costumes and definitely made it feel like more of an ‘event’ and helped really create the world of the movie.

    I would love to go to another Secret Cinema event after this one as I had a terrific time. However, my friends might take some persuading! I can see where the event didn’t work for them and for the reviewer here – there were things that could have been done differently or improved upon. As one commenter here said, you’re living the movie – you’re in the world of the movie – and therefore it’s a waste of that to try and track down and view the movie. It’s showing all around the building on various screens, in screening rooms, and on the side of the courtyard building, but the best thing is to experience the world of the movie in all its frustrations. However, if you’ve never seen the movie or aren’t familiar with it, then I think a lot of the evening would be lost on you. And Brazil, while a cult classic, isn’t instantly familiar to everyone. I think that most secret cinema experiences would surely be improved by a knowledge of the movie before going.

    Anyway, this was my first time, and I couldn’t believe how much I loved it. I think there’s only one more performance left, but if anyone going is reading this, I’d advise you to a) watch the movie first and b) once you’re in there – EXPLORE! Talk to people – you can usually tell who the actors are and you should definitely talk to them. Interact, ask questions – don’t be shy! Go up to people and ask who they are, or what they’re doing, and where you should go next. If one of the actors suggests something then go along with it, play up to it, use a bit of improvisation and enter the world they are creating for you. There are twelve floors, and they ALL have something going on – some more than others. One was just a drinks, food and party floor for example, while one was for dream analysis and personality tests. Get stuck in, poke your head around doors, ask people who they are and what they’d recommend you do. And be sure to get a window seat looking over the courtyard just before 10pm!

    I’d like to thank the original poster of this article. I know you didn’t have a good time, and I can see why and understand that totally – but as a result of this article and the people responding to it, I had a terrific time, so I found it incredibly helpful. I hope you’ll give Secret Cinema another try one day.

    • Sharon
      June 8, 2013 at 17:42

      I definitely think you need to be familiar with the movie to appreciate this event.

      • John
        June 10, 2013 at 07:54

        Well it was SC and we had no idea what the film was, this was a total waste of a evening.
        The film, I was told was on the SC wish list, but it is not a classic or that great a film, and like Monthy python humour, it was ‘from it’s time’ the younger people in my party of 5 didn’t get it at all, had never seen the film, or I get the feeling want I see it.

  44. John
    June 8, 2013 at 09:12

    You lucky it was your first time, you missed the great SC experience and how it should be done. The last few before this one have been amazing experience. as I said we too 3 newbies, and they never heard of the film, and after I banged on about SC, they wondered why! SC have lost 3 new fans, and maybe myself as well. Mega let-down.

  45. John
    June 10, 2013 at 15:25

    Sharon :
    Yep, I could see how that would work 1200 people all experiencing the same scene at the same time. What nonsense.
    And in our case with someone who was 6mths pregnant, getting in a lift, forget it, we stayed stuck on the 3rd floor.
    And with very few seats.

  46. Mowglimann
    June 10, 2013 at 15:43

    I was utterly disappointed. Having heard so much about Secret Cinema, I thought the £45 might possibly be worth it. It was not. At all.

    Presumably when someone sells you a ticket to the ‘cinema’, you expect there to be some form of screen with a film on. There was no such thing. We saw two old school televisions on the floor showing the film with no sound.

    We didn’t even get any notification about the start of the film. We got rinsed for £20 for the the worst 5 minute massage ever. Drinks were overpriced and the food was poor.

    Some of the cast and security people even broke character to apologise for the awful event:
    “Yeah sorry mate, this one is bollocks. Other ones have been good though.”

    Never again.

  47. John
    June 10, 2013 at 20:13

    P :
    I was only suggesting, there must have been a reason to ‘follow the screens’. I don’t know though, everyone seemed to have a completely different experience, which is obviously bound to happen, i just wish that less of them were negative. It’s a shame- i think secret cinema put all of their effort into making it as fantastic as they could, i suppose the way they organised it was just not to everyone’s taste.

    Not to,everyone taste, you should check out SC Facebook, much more negative than positive. I was told this was on the SC wishlist, and hat I believe was the problem they wanted to,do,it for themself’s without any thought to SC fans or how it really owing o work if you had never seen the film, or guessed it before hand, then it became just a disaster of a evening with (in our case) wandering around not having a clue what to do.

  48. Liam
    June 12, 2013 at 18:35

    I really enjoyed it. You really had to hunt around and find interesting and exciting things to do, and there was in-fact a LOT more than 7 floors. It was nice not to be shunted into a cinema at the end. I enjoyed it just as much as Prometheus, perhaps Prometheus was always going to be a big better because of the sci-fi elements. I was disappointed with the previous one, Shawshank Redemption however. Because it was obvious what it was from the first moment, I mean damn- how many prison films are there? This one was exciting, and the fact that it was such a gigantic venue just made me constantly jaw-drop.

    If you had your eyes open properly, you could have found a hole in a wall where crawling through would take you into an amazing room of torn up newspaper. You have to listen out for clues, and ask staff where to head to next- I did that SO MANY TIMES and their advice ALWAYS got me to somewhere interesting. Too many people stood around drinking and going ‘well this is shit’… i’m not surprised their alcohol-inspired lives are shit, i’d imagine their entire LIFE is shit.

    • July 23, 2014 at 17:29

      My life is far from shit thank you very much.
      I just don’t like being taken for a ride and being told when I should be having fun. Dressing up and pretending is not everyone’s idea of a good time, certainly not mine.
      Thanks for taking the time to comment though…

  49. July 12, 2013 at 13:53

    Thanks for finally talking about >Secret Cinema : G.O.
    O.D = S.H.*.T | Joe Blogs <Loved it!

  50. April 8, 2014 at 12:48

    Hey! We featured this as the best cinema experience in the world! Check out our top 5 round up: http://youtu.be/BMSxH6wBOi0

  51. May 18, 2014 at 19:37

    Hi! I could have sworn I’ve been to this blog before but after reading through some of the
    post I realized it’s new to me. Anyways, I’m definitely delighted I found
    it and I’ll be bookmarking and checking back often!

  52. lorraine
    July 23, 2014 at 15:16

    All the people defending SC by viciously attacking those with a different opinion to theirs sound like such pretentious arseholes, that the prospect of spending an evening with a load of them makes me shudder and I am turning down my invite for tonight. Hopefully that means those that do turn up get more attention.

  53. John clement
    July 25, 2014 at 13:34

    Have secret cinema not learnt from the farce that was Brazil, they are now to big, can’t cope and don’t give a toss about the loyal fans.

  54. Mel
    March 23, 2015 at 11:06

    If anyone who has attended the secret cinema would like to fill out my dissertation survey, I’d be very grateful. The link’s below. Thanks


  55. December 2, 2015 at 16:46

    Hello there!

    My name is Kim Louise Walden, School of Creative Arts, University of Hertfordshire

    I am writing to you as I have been doing some research on Secret Cinema and was very interested to read your blog entry as well as the comments it has received since posting.

    Here is my university research portal to verify who I am.

    Please copy and paste this url into a search engine:

    I am hoping to publish a paper on my research shortly and I would like to ask your permission to use two images from your blog in the paper.
    1. the GOOD Web site
    2. The ‘Notice of Transfer’ ticket’.

    I will receive no payment for this paper. It’s just part of my job!

    If you are happy to give me permission, please can you drop me a line to K.Walden2@Herts.ac.uk

    • December 4, 2015 at 00:01

      Hi Kim
      I’ve responded directly to your email address, but if for any reason that doesn’t make it through, I’d be happy for you to use my scans in your research.
      I’d also be very interested to read the final article if you could send me a link…

  1. May 13, 2013 at 00:10
  2. July 25, 2014 at 14:02

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